Confessions of a First Year Teacher (I Thought I was Teaching Them, but Really They were Teaching Me)

As I watched the yellow buses scuttle away for this last time this school year, I tried to pinpoint exactly what emotions I was feeling as my thoughts clouded together, gently blurring. While packing up my classroom, I sorted through piles of math games, books, and writing materials. So much growth and learning had occurred throughout the school year from multiplication and division to writing a full length essay. I had covered all of the standards and all assessments had been completed. These packed boxes, brimming with papers and books, however, did not present a whole, complete picture of what had been gained. Although I (hopefully!) taught my students many things, nothing in these boxes reflected what I, the teacher, had learned from a group of 24 third-graders.

1). Kindness

I entered my classroom with the expectation to focus on cultivating a culture of kindness within the classroom. However, little did I realize that I myself would be learning so much about being kind from a group of eight-and-nine-year olds. We read many books focusing on kindness and treating others with respect, and the kids were more than happy to lead the discussion. Personal experiences about interactions with others, both positive and negative, were eagerly shared. The students validated each other’s experiences through their desire to sincerely listen, reminding me that sometimes the kindest thing you can do for someone is to simply listen with undivided attention.

The kids also demonstrated their hearts for seeking out opportunities to be kind. Many of their actions may have seemed small, however, it is the smallest kindnesses that can add up to making the biggest differences. Smiles were exchanged for encouraging and complimentary notes spontaneously delivered to a classmate. Actively seeking out students who might be lonely or feel excluded was something I frequently observed, showing me the importance of being purposeful and intentional in looking for chances to be kind. Perhaps kindness is so often forgotten not because of any malicious intent but because of missed opportunities.

2). Creativity

It is so easy to fall into rigid ways of thinking and doing things. So many things are simply rote and routine that figuring out a different approach never entered my mind.

This was not the case with my students.

I lost track of how many times I said to parents at conferences, “The way your student thinks is so creative. They look at problems creativiely and analyze critically in ways that I never even thought about.”

The kids tackled new math problems in unique ways that I often had to ask them to explain to me how they worked with the numbers. They made thoughtful, abstract connections between literature texts. When given art projects, their finished product never looked exactly like mine. Their creative touches were evident, beautifully unique and solely theirs.

To be creative involves losing the fear of being wrong. It requires the ability to stretch, to grow, to feel uncomfortable. Being creative isn’t the easy way out. However, the results are often so much more meaningful and personal.

3). Dignity

I’ve shared this quote before, but reflecting on and applying this quote has taught me so much this year. During my student teaching, I was asking a teacher how to deal with a situation that had occurred with a student. He had lots of helpful, practical advice, but it was his beginning sentence that stuck with me. “The first and most important thing to remember,” he said, “is to always preserve the student’s dignity.”

In education, there is a focus on assessment and standards. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but the most important thing is the students and who they are as people. When students feel safe, loved, and respected, real, authentic learning will occur. This is something I knew already, but truly learned to internalize this past year.  

There were moments, especially around the time of state assessments, that the pressure felt like it was building, a looming Mt. Everest. So much to do and so little time. However, the kids still needed to feel safe and cared for. Their needs didn’t disappear simply because there were deadlines to meet. Preserving dignity and caring for the whole child was still just as important.

The same is true for all people. When circumstances are chaotic or busy, it can be easy to develop tunnel vision and be singularly focused on goals. However, people are what really matter. Their dignity and well-being have to be remembered because society so often will try to convince them otherwise.

Learning is not contained in textbooks and tests. Sometimes, the lessons we learn have nothing to do with what is actually on the lesson plan. The most unlikely circumstances and people are often the people we learn the most from. If you had asked me at the beginning of the year if I thought I’d grow over the course of the year, I would have answered, “Of course.” I expected to grow professionally and as a teacher, but I didn’t realize that the lessons would extend to my personal life. Approaching life as an opportunity to learn, grow, and discover is scary. It requires a willingness to change and confront weaknesses. However, it’s also a grand adventure that can prove to be truly life-changing.